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Forming Faith Musings

 

Musing 1:       Children in Early Christianity

Musing 2:         Godparenting

Musing 3:       Family Foibles


Musing 1:       Children in Early Christianity

I have recently finished reading Odd Bakke’s book When Children Became People: The Birth of Childhood in Early Christianity (Minneapolis: Fortress Press 2005).   Bakke is Associate Professor of Church History at the School of Mission and Theology, Stavanger, Norway.   The book’s focus is on the church’s view of children in early Christianity (c. 100-450 CE) and the impact this had on how Christians raised their children and their place in the life of the church.   The title reflects the ancient Greco-Roman view of children as incomplete persons, a view countered by early Christian thinkers.   Aristotle, for instance held that ‘a child is not complete and whole, but attains this state only when it grows up and is formed in keeping with conduct appropriate to noble adult behaviour’ [19].   The diminished Greco-Roman view of children was practically reflected in the ‘very widespread practice’ of abortion [27] and the widespread exposure (expositio) of infant children.

 

Bakke finds a ‘different attitude’ in the early apologists and church fathers (e.g. Clement of Alexandria, Aristides of Athens, Cyprian, Augustine, John Chrysostom) to the worth of young children reflected in the pagan moral-philosophical tradition:   ‘Whereas pagans thought that a newborn baby was not a human person in the full sense, patristic thinking implies that the newborn possesses the fullness of human dignity’ [109].   Abortion, expositio and infanticide were all harshly condemned by early Christian writers and it is probable that their stance had some correspondence in a lower incidence among Christian families.   Bakke further argues that ‘children – especially boys – were much less involved in sexual relations with adults in a Christian context than was the case in pagan antiquity’ [149].

 

Particularly interesting is Bakke’s chapter on early Christian upbringing and education of children.   Bakke points out that children are directly addressed in both Ephesians (6:1) and Colossians (3:20).   This might not be unusual today, but it is striking in the light of the ancient view and treatment of children.   Epistolary address to children implies, writes Bakke, that the author/s ‘take it for granted that the children are part of the community and are members of the group that assembles when the letter is read during worship in the various domestic churches’ [153]. Both the epistles and early Christian writers emphasise parental responsibility for raising children in the Christian faith.   Bakke notes that ‘in comparison with the pagan sources, nurses, pedagogues, and other slaves and servants in the household play a smaller role in the Christian sources’ [221].   Early Christian sources imply an ideal where parents are ‘more involved in upbringing than seems to have been the case in pagan families’ and have greater social contact with their children than seems to have been usual in pagan households.   Parents are to ‘socialize their children into the ideals for a Christian way of life by instructing them in scripture and initiating them into a comprehensive life of piety that includes reading the Bible, singing psalms, prayer, fasting and vigils.   Their parents are to take their children along to the meetings of the church community’ [218].

 

Of all the patristic writers, John Chrysostom paid most attention to the upbringing of children.   Chrysostom placed the utmost importance on their Christian nurture:   Let everything take second place to our care for our children, our bringing them up in the discipline and instruction of our Lord.   Chrysostom gave some very practical instruction to parents on the content and process of upbringing:  

  1. Parents were to instruct their children in God’s Word.   They are to “teach the child so that the words revolve on his lips all the time, even on his walks abroad, not lightly nor incidentally nor at rare intervals, but without ceasing” [189]. Parents should read or tell bible stories to their children.
  2. Parents were to balance punitive discipline with positive affirmation and acknowledgement.
  3. Parents were to serve as moral guardians for the children, taking care that they were not exposed to things that might have a bad moral influence upon them.
  4. As part of their instruction in sacred scripture, parents were to take their children with them to church.   When they heard the same stories told there that they had learned at home, they would then recognise them and be happy.
  5. Parents were to expose their children to other adults who could serve as good faith role models for them.

Bakke’s study of early church sources further reveals a surprising level of participation by children in worship.   Children were active singers and ‘it was their task to sing particular responses in the liturgy and to sing in the choir, and they could also function as lectors’ [251].   Boys as young as five were ordained as lectors (presumably meaning they began to prepared for this role from this age).   From a theological point of view, early Christians saw children as being equal to adults in their relationship to God, and this logically led to their presence and participation in worship.

Posted:   8 October 2005

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Musing 2:       Godparenting

There are few honours in the Christian life greater than that of being asked to be a godparent to a child.  In becoming a godparent a person is given a special role in something of eternal consequence, the forming of faith in a newly baptized Christian.  Godparents have special rights and privileges in naming the things of God to their godchildren, and reminding them of the enduring meaning and significance of God’s baptismal promise.  At the font the godparent is gifted with a special bond to their godchild, a bond that is full of spiritual permission, promise and potential.

 

“Gaining Faith” for Children

The role of godparenting begins with the answering of questions around the baptismal font.  When an infant is baptized, the godparent confesses faith in the Triune God on behalf of the child.  This is no small matter of mere human words!  In dealing with the question of how an infant could be said to have or gain faith through baptism, Martin Luther pointed to the faith of ‘sponsors and of the church’ in “gaining” faith for the baptized.  In his 1525 sermon on Matt. 8:1-13, Luther declared that:  ‘in baptism the children themselves believe and have their own faith, which God effects in them through the sponsors, when in the faith of the Christian church they intercede for them and bring them to baptism. … Children are not baptized in the faith of the sponsors or the church; but the faith of sponsors and of the church prays and gains faith for them, in which they are baptized and believe for themselves’.

 

Helping Pass on the Faith

At the font, godparents also promise to join with parents in nurturing the gift of faith in the newly baptized child.  In doing so, godparents represent the wider church.  Bringing up a baptized child in the faith is not just a responsibility of the parents, but of the whole Christian community. Godparents become the personal and human face of the whole people of God as they relate to their godchildren and care for them in Christ’s name. As Lutheran author Elaine Ramshaw writes, ‘the baptismal charge, while it needs to be placed on the whole community, will not be fulfilled unless it is institutionalized in individual relationships’. 

 

In their relationship with their godchildren, godparents can serve as significant non-parent adult faith mentors.  Research indicates that a key factor in the faith formation of children and young people for lifelong church involvement is the presence and activity in their lives of Christian adults beyond their immediate family.  At the font, the godparent is given a special invitation into relationship with their godchild.  In and through this relationship, godparents have potential access into the deepest hopes, hurts and joys of their godchildren.  As the child explores their faith and its relationship to their lives, godparents can play a unique role in raising and answering questions that parents cannot and pointing to the loving care and presence of God in the midst of life’s struggles.

 

So What’s a Godparent to Do?

The key to effecting godparenting is nurturing a relationship over time.  You don’t have to be hyper-spiritual, but a real, authentic person of faith that is willing to develop a relationship of genuine appreciation and care.  Here are some suggestions for reminding your godchild of their baptism and sharing your faith and values:

 

·        Pray for them and for their parents each day.  Phone them regularly to ask for specific prayer points to help direct your prayer.

·        Send your godchild a card and a gift each year on their baptismal anniversary.

·        Mark other special events in your godchild’s life (birthdays, starting school, achievements) in some way.

·        Share with them stories of God’s work in your life.

·        Give your godchild faith related books, CDs or toys.

·        Buy them a subscription to a Christian magazine.

·        Sponsor their attendance at a children’s ministry event or youth camp.

·        Let your godchild designate some of your charitable giving.

·        Attend milestone moments in their faith journey e.g. First Communion, Confirmation.

·        Take them to worship with you whenever possible.

·        Arrange for them to holiday with you every so often.

 

Congregations and Godparents

Through supporting the ministries of godparents, congregations can strengthen the baptismal nurture of the children in their midst and grow in godparents a deeper appreciation of the wonders of baptism.

 

A good starting point for congregations is helping parents to make good choices of godparents for their children.  Then once godparents are selected, a congregation can take an active role in preparing them for their role.  This may involve meeting with godparents or communicating with them by mail.

Aspects of godparent preparation could include how to communicate with a child, how to remember baptism together, and how to nurture a long-distance relationship.  Congregations might also take a “long term view” of the godparent ministry, putting in place a process for ongoing contact and support e.g. a congregation might keep and maintain a godparent database, making regular contact with godparents to remind them of their calling and to support and resource them in their role.

 

Congregations can also give special visibility and emphasis to godparenting through worship. One Sunday a year could be given a godparent focus.  All godparents could receive a blessing on such a Sunday, and godparent-godchild “pairs” within the congregation could be gathered for a related cross-generational event.

 

Congregational Godparents

In a time of geographic mobility and the isolation of nuclear families from extended family, many godparents live some distance from their godchildren.  Children and youth need adults from their own congregations who take an active interest in them and their spiritual journeys.  For this reason, congregations may consider providing baptized children with congregational godparents in addition to their parent-selected godparents where none of the latter belong to the congregation.  Congregational godparents can take an active role in the baptismal service, and in follow-up ministry to the child and their family.  Children becoming part of the congregation at a later age could also be “gifted” with congregational godparents, practicing Christians who take an active interest in them and their welfare.

 

Posted 16 February 2006

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Musing 3:     Family Foibles

Growing up myself as a pastor’s kid, and now being a pastor with a family, I am aware of how sometimes people assume that the pastor’s family somehow must be different from their own – more harmonious, more spiritual, more “together”.  But, living on the inside, I know otherwise.  Both my birth family and my family through marriage are very typical, ordinary families.  We squabble, we fight, we get annoyed with each other, we hurt one another through self-centredness and a lack of care.  We are no more “functional” than most families can claim to be.

 

When we look at families in the bible, we see the same picture.  From the first family parented by Adam and Eve, through to the families of Abraham and Sarah, Jacob, Leah and Rachel, King David and his many wives, we see families deeply affected by disputes, jealousy and even violence.  Cain kills his brother Abel.  Sarah and Hagar conflict, with Hagar banished to the wilderness.  Jacob plays favourites with Joseph.  Joseph’s brothers sell him to strangers and fake his death.  Absolom revolts against his father David.  And so on, and so on.  The family tree of Jesus himself, recorded in Matthew 1, also makes for very interesting reading.  Names such as Tamar, Rahab and Manasseh recall colourful stories.  There are as many closet skeletons in the biblical genealogies of Jesus as in any of our own families.

 

Thinking on this, I am encouraged in two ways.  Firstly, God’s faithfulness and patience with the families of the bible assures me of his faithfulness and patience with my family also.  God worked through and in spite of all sorts of family dysfunction to sustain and bring to fruition his promises to the Old Testament patriarchs.  I am therefore comforted that whatever takes place in my own family is not a sign of God’s abandonment.  God’s promises are not contingent upon my family or I having it all together.  No - in Christ, God meets us where we are, blesses us with his grace, and empowers us to struggle through our dysfunction.

 

Secondly, I am reminded that what takes in family life is not a sideshow to my spiritual life but sits at its very heart.  The biblical accounts of family life show ordinary people struggling to live out and express their faith in their concrete, daily relationships with one another.  In that, God formed and shaped them for his good purposes.  In reflecting on the dispute within Abraham’s family between Sarah and Hagar, Martin Luther wrote that we should learn from such accounts that “in wedlock there is far severer training in faith, hope, love, patience, and prayer than there is in all the monasteries”.  We should not think it strange that disputes arise “among even the most affectionate and the saintliest people”.  On the contrary, we should “consider that in marriage there are such varied exercises in godliness and love”.  The disputes and trials of marriage and family life are opportunities for practicing godliness and love.  They are also a means by which God works to bring us low, so that he might reshape us to better reflect his will.  A person of faith does not therefore run away from or despise the troubles of family life, but commits to work through them in the knowledge of God’s faithfulness, grace and loving concern. 

 

Our families may not be “all together” but as people of faith, Christ is together with us in the midst of them.  May God continue to shape you in, through and for the life of your family.

Posted 3 March 2007

 

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